Gemini (the twins)
May 21-- June 20
1) You have a unique personality.
2) Geminis always get good grades in school.
3) Gemini people have twin chins and are two faced.
4) You're so cheap, you do your Christmas shopping at Seven-Eleven.
5) A thousand-dollar outfit on you looks like socks on a rooster.
6) People will worship the quicksand you will walk in.
7) People stand in line just to hate you.
8) The reason why you have a unique personality is because it's split.
9) Geminis always get good grades because they always cheat.
10) A lot of Gemini's die by inserting large objects into their rectums.
11) You have half a brain; that's why mind readers charge you half price.
12) When people attempt to reach your mind, they can never find it.
13) If you are what you eat, then you are fast, cheap and easy.
Best career moves: dumpster cleaner, condom roller, sex organ donor